The day had started off horrible already.  On my way to school it had started drizzling and then out of nowhere thunder shook the ground and lightening cracked in the sky.  The downpour had begun.  My book bag was getting soaked by the second and my hair was matted to my head in a very unattractive way.  I let my shoes scrape the gravel as I trudged through the puddles and let every drop fall of water fall on me, not caring at all.
	When I finally got to school I was late, great.  I shoved my book bag in my locker and threw my coat on top of the mess of papers that acted as a black hole would, sucking up my homework and along with that, my grades.  I grabbed the materials I needed for math and made sure I had a pencil.  I had gotten in trouble too many times for not bringing one.  Stomping down the hall I reached my class, I opened the door and my shoulders slumped.  Apparently we had changed seats. This was just all too perfect, now I was going to have to go ask Mr. Merchant where my seat was, in front of the whole class.  An absolutely great way to draw unwanted attention to myself.  
	Thinking about how misplaced I probably already looked standing by the pencil sharpener next to the door, I mustered up the courage to go ask Mr. Merchant where he desired my new seat to be.  
	“Um, excuse me Mr. Merchant?” I silently whispered, my head hung low.
	“Yes Amelia?”
	“Um... I was just wondering where my new seat is.”
	“Amelia, Amelia, Amelia, let me check my seating chart, hold on. Oh, you are right over there,” he said gesturing to an empty desk next to Parker Linderman.  
	“Next to... Parker?” I asked, quietly hoping and praying that putting me next to her was not his intention.
	“Yes, next to Miss Linderman. Is there a problem with that, Miss Hall?
	“Oh no, that should be just fine, thank you,” I said as my face burned a great shade of red.
	“Alright then you may head to your seat now, Amelia.  We are just looking over our tests that were just graded, I believe yours is sitting on your desk.”
	I looked at the ground and quickly walked to my new desk next to her.  Parker Linderman.  Parker was the most popular girl in school and always loved picking on girls who weren’t her friends.  And that meant she loved picking on me.  Actually I believe she cherished picking on me.  I believe it is the most exciting part of her day except for when her boyfriend Jake comes over and gives her one of his huge bear hugs.  Don’t get me wrong, Jake is probably the cutest guy in school, but when he’s with her, it just disgusts me how much she kisses up to him and acts like such an angel.  I know for a fact she’s nowhere close to being accepted into heaven.  
	Now that I get to sit next to her in math, which is my least favorite and worst subject, I’m sure she will be having a great time teasing me about my “ugly poop colored hair that is so greasy people could mine from it.” Or she’ll talk about my clothes that are hand me downs from my cousins.  “Last time I checked you can’t wear purple and orange polka dots on the same shirt or even in the same week, especially with those pants that make your butt look bigger than it already is.”
	I sat down.  I grabbed my test and silently crumpled it up in my hand.  
	“Don’t you wanna see the big fat F scribbled on the top of your paper?” smirked Parker, as she yanked the test out of my hand.  Satisfying herself, she took a long look at my test, occasionally nodding her head to make it seem like she really cared.  But I knew all she wanted was to make sure I got an F, and like always she got a better grade, usually an A.  
	“See what you did here.  You added instead of multiplying and you ended up with the wrong answer, X does not equal -4.6.  Maybe if you started paying attention in class instead of sitting there acting all depressed and in need of sympathy you would know without hesitation that X equals 8.92, obviously!  You make me look super smart, I applaud you Amelia Hall, bravo!”
	At that moment all the anger I’d been holding back rushed to my head, my hands were getting all sweaty, suddenly I felt sick.  Holding back my feelings towards her was getting all too hard for me to keep inside my over flowing head.  Without thinking, I yelled.  All my feelings rushed right out of my mouth not filtering or processing anything I screamed.  Screaming at her brought so much relief over me, it felt like all this weight just dropped directly off my shoulders and on to hers.  In those few seconds I hoped she felt the way I did everyday.  Except right now I felt different, I felt confident and like my own person.  Too bad that great feeling only lasted for a couple seconds.  The weight piled right back on my shoulders as I sat waiting in the principal’s office.
	“Well hello, Amelia, how are you today?” asked Mr. Patterson, squinting at me over his thick black glasses.  Now why would he ask me that?  Obviously I’m having a bad day, I’m sitting in the principal’s office for heaven’s sake!  
	“I’m fine thank you,” I answered, expressionless.
	“Good,” he said simply. “Amelia Hall would you mind explaining to me what brought you here?”
	“Um, I guess I just had a bad day, Mr. Patterson, and that F I got on my test pushed me to my limit.  I really did try to get an A, and instead I got the same grade I always end up getting.  And Parker was trying to help me because she felt that I wanted help and I really appreciate the fact that she had such a kind heart to help me with the problems I got wrong.  I just overreacted and thought she was calling me dumb, which of course would never be her intentions!  I’m sorry, I really didn’t mean any of it, I’m just having a bad day.”  
	“Hmm, I see.  Well why don’t you go apologize to Parker and we will forget about this whole situation?  I mean forget about it after your detention you’ve earned yourself today, Miss Hall.”
	“Alright, Mr. Patterson,” I mumbled, “I’ll do it.”
	“You may return to class now with an apology for Miss Linderman, and don’t you forgot about detention tonight, room 104.  I don’t want to see you back in here, Amelia.”
	“Okay, goodbye.” I darted towards the door and felt my lungs open back up, allowing me to breathe again.  Looking down at my feet forcefully sliding on the newly polished floor, I dreaded going back to class.  It wasn’t math class anymore though, my incident had used all that time up, but it was history, and of course Parker was in that class with me, too.  At least her seat wasn’t anywhere near mine.  Going into class meant being late for another class today.  I know that feeling all too well, everyone staring at you as you enter in the door and then they all begin whispering coming up with endless possibilities for why you showed up to class late.  
	Instead of walking into class, I locked myself in the very back bathroom stall and stayed there until the bell rang.  Crying.
	I lied.  I lied to Mr. Patterson.  Why couldn’t I just resolve this problem right then and there?  Why couldn’t I just tell Mr. Patterson the truth that Parker was not just being a nice person and she normally acts rude to me and everyday is a bad day for me.   Now I’ve gotten myself in a whole bunch of trouble, I have to apologize to Parker when she should be the one apologizing to me for completely ruining my life.
	After I got home from a terribly boring time in detention I locked myself in my room not hungry enough to eat any dinner.  It’s not like my mom cared anyway.  She’s too busy with her college classes to worry about me.  
	She started going to the community college, which is a few minutes from our house, last November after she decided that her old job at McDonald’s wasn’t enough to support both of us.  My so called “dad” left her after he found out she was pregnant.  My mom says he wasn’t mature enough and ready to settle down and live an adult life.  I don’t mind much since I’ve never known him, and my mom doesn’t seem to care because she never mentions him.  But sometimes I wonder what it would be like to have a dad.
	That night I fell asleep thinking about what would have happened if I told Mr. Patterson the truth about Parker.  About what she’s done to me.  About all the insecurity and grief she’s caused me.  Maybe she would’ve gotten in big trouble.  But that’s what I’m worried about.  If she gets in trouble she could get the whole school to bully me.  It’s all about power.  And Parker has a lot of it.
	When I woke up the sun shone brightly, glaring at me through my opened window.  My house is right by a hill so when the mornings are nice it is such a sight to see.  The sun peeks over the hill and glows on all of my neighborhood.  That’s definitely the best thing about this small house we live in.  
	I forced myself out of my bed and glanced in my bathroom mirror, what a beautiful sight.  Sometimes I think Parker’s right.  I am ugly.  I mean I look awful!  I’ve got huge bags under my eyes, and my face is pale.  My hair is sticking out in all different directions and my teeth felt all grimy.  Looking like this, I believe Parker.  
	Suddenly I felt awful.  I wasn’t prepared to face another day at school, it would just be torture.  Mom had already left for classes and she wouldn’t be back until two.  I usually got home from school at 2:45, forty-five minutes out of the house and she would never notice I didn’t attend school.  It was an ingenious plan!  Relief swept over me as I knew I didn’t have to face my nightmare at school.  I closed my blinds and lay back down.  Pulling the covers over my head for comfort, I fell right back into a peaceful sleep.
	I woke up well rested and happy.  The sun still shone brilliantly, but now it had risen and was placed in the top of the sky looking over me.  I continued to be pleased with my plan of skipping school.  My positive attitude looked ahead at the rest of the day that awaited me.  I grabbed my sketchbook and waltzed outside into the fascinating outdoors.  Drawing had become a passion of mine last year when I had nothing else to turn to.  I drew people and animals and most of all, nature.  I had many drawings of the trees in my backyard and of the sun shining over the peak of the mountain.  Today I decided to draw the old, beaten up, moldy wood playground my grandparents gave my mom before they cut off all communication with us because they were too embarrassed of their unsuccessful daughter.
	The once yellow slide was now stained with the sun’s rays and the ladder leading up to the slide had all sorts of vines growing on it.  There was one swing left dangling by one rusty metal chain that looked as if it was about to detach itself from the wooden bar above.  
	I took out my pencils and started drawing.  Each color molding into different colors making different shades and patterns.  The grass and leaves were blowing in the breeze, making such a mellifluous sound to my ears.  It was so very peaceful, and eventually I tuned out the rest of the world and forgot about all my problems.  It was just me and my pencils.
	It was 1:50 and I needed to get out of the house now.  Mom would be home soon and she couldn’t see that I had stayed home.  My day had been great, and a day off was just what I had needed.  It had given me time to reflect and think about my life.  I had decided I would ask Parker why she bullies me and I would stick up for myself for once.  Easier said than done though.  
	I scrambled out of the house with my book bag so it would look like I had gone to school, and headed for the path that takes me to the dreaded place of torture.  I walked halfway through the path towards school and then sat down on the dirty ground under a canopy of trees.  I looked up.  The sun was shining through little pockets the trees made and danced upon the leaves.  Beautiful, absolutely astounding.  I grabbed my pencils and pad I kept in my book bag and began to capture the moment in my drawing.
	I had lost all track of time when I was drawing and when I finally finished it was 2:52.  I should’ve been home by now, but I didn’t care, I was too busy admiring my drawing.  It was definitely one of the most detailed drawings I’d ever done, but at the same time it looked abstract.  I was becoming somewhat of an impressionist.  Very pleased with my new piece of artwork and style, I skipped all the way home with my book bag slung over my shoulder.  
	Smiling as I opened the door, I rushed to my mom’s bedroom which was where she spent her time doing her schoolwork.  I opened the door and saw all the scattered papers blanketing the ground.  The textbooks stacked like mountains towering as high as her bed.  And there she was, lying on the bed skimming a thick old book, her forehead crinkled in frustration.
	“Mom?” I asked.  
	Startled, she looked up, “Hey, Amelia, what’s up?”  Her voice was as sweet as sugar when she cooed my name.  Each letter rolling into the next forming the most lovely pronunciation of my name.  I savored it, knowing I wouldn’t hear my name like that for a while.
	“Nothing, I just wanted to peek in and say hi, that’s it.”
	“Oh honey, I’m sorry I’ve been so busy, I’ve just had all this work and...” her voice trailed off.
	“It’s ok, mom, really I don’t mind.  I just wanted to see what you were up to.”
	“Stuff you aren’t interested in, I don’t see any point in boring you with it.  How was your day?”
	“Great thanks,” I cheerfully responded, hoping she wouldn’t catch the mysterious gleam in my eye whenever I reflected on my day.
	“Well that’s good to hear,” Mom beamed at me.  “Listen, hun, I really need to get this done, how about we hang out later tonight and have some dinner together?”
	“Sure, Mom, that sounds good!”  I said smiling.  My day just kept getting better and better.  Nothing was ruining it now.
	After an enjoyable night with just my mom and I for once, I drifted off into a soothing sleep.  		
	I awoke suddenly; jumping out of my bed, shaken by my alarm clock noise interrupting my sleep.  6:04, that’s what my alarm clock said,  and whenever I had to get up at six meant it was a school day.  I aimlessly grabbed clothes out of my closet, not caring what they looked like, and put them on.  In the bathroom I brushed my teeth and combed my knotted hair out.  When I was done my hair was all frizzy and my face pale.  Just like normal.  But for once I smiled.  Although my appearance wasn’t something going on the cover of a magazine, it was me and it was my normal.  And I had learned to accept that.  
	Jogging to school was very refreshing, and I wasn’t late.  Once I got to school, I carefully set my book bag in my locker and with the extra fifteen minutes I managed to have I sorted out my papers.  I set foot into math five minutes before the final bell rang and reviewed for the test we were having today.  Setting high expectations for myself since I had studied, I paid attention and ignored Parker’s presence.  When the test was placed in front of me, I didn’t find myself guessing on all the answers; instead I was able to figure all of them out by the end of class.  A smile spread across my face as I handed my test to Mr. Merchant and he smiled back, obviously surprised.  
	I walked with a purpose to my locker and got out my materials for history.  As I closed my locker, I heard footsteps creeping up behind me.  Swiftly turning around on my heels, I found myself face to face with Parker Linderman, the girl I had never apologized to.  I gave her a grave stare right into both her eyes and smiled sweetly at her.  
	“Hello, Parker,” I stated.
	“Good morning, grease ball,” she retorted.
	“Why do you feel the need to put me down all the time?  Don’t you feel good about yourself already?” I retaliated
	To that, Parker had no response.  I could see she was openly feeling insecure, red spread all over her face, leaving her cheeks a rosier red than they were before.  
	“So, that’s a no? You don’t feel good about yourself?”  I questioned.
	More embarrassed than ever before, Parker turned away fast and took long instantaneous strides toward the doorway.  Once out of sight, I felt the warm smile extend upon my face, something I rarely felt.  
	The rest of the school day went by without another problem and nothing sparked between Parker and me.  In fact I could tell she was avoiding me because whenever I was near her she veered away.  
	I pranced home and spent the rest of the day with my mom, painting.  I’ve never known my mom had such an artistic talent, but when she picked up the brush it glided right across the canvas and made a wonderful landscape picture.
	That night I felt great.  Thinking about the day brought joy to me and a smile on my face.     
I was very proud of what I did and knew it was okay now.  
	The next few days Parker continued her silence and didn’t provoke anything.  That’s how the rest of the year seemed to go.  I was never bothered by her again, and I’m just thankful for the one day I took off from school that let me realize what I needed to do.
	Now everyday school seemed to go well and I brought up all my grades to at least a B+ and finished the year on a great note.  Now it’s the time for relaxing and drawing and painting the beautiful summer world around me.  It’s the way I find the sun shining in my dark times.
?
		Finding the Sun in the Dark, 6-8, pg.1